I Already Have Self Confidence...Losing Weight Won't Change Me...THAT'S A LIE.

I've had many conversations that go something like this..."Erin, losing weight is going to completely change who you are."  My response always was..."No way.  I'm secure with myself, and losing part of my body won't change who I am."  Well...I couldn't have been more wrong.  As my body started changing, so did my view of myself.  Let me explain...I'm no model, nor do I look in the mirror with a pompous, arrogant attitude; but, I do realize now that I allowed my weight to keep from living life to its fullest potential.  Of course, I was unconscious to this fact until I realized that the self confidence I had was miniscule in comparison to what I have now.  Before, I always used my sense of humor to get attention in social settings and to attempt to deter others from noticing that I was fat.  I always had to do something loud to get attention in a group, and while this is rather sad to admit, it's the truth...and this blog is all about the ugly truth no matter how embarrassing it may be.  An interesting realization to come to is that in some situations I don't have to speak to be noticed...it's something that other people take for granted, and I realize that it sounds petty.  Hearing compliments like "I really like your outfit!" or "I can't believe how great you look!" or "I'm super jealous of you!" are comments that are flattering yet difficult to wrap my brain around.  Many times when someone compliments me, I think thoughts like..."Oh they are just saying that to make me feel good," or sometimes I'll even turn my head to see who they are talking about.  It's in those situations that I became extremely uncomfortable because I didn't know how to take compliments from people other than my family and friends.  I knew they complimented me because they loved me, but these random people at the grocery store have no clue who I am.  I would've never admitted it out loud, but I always felt uncomfortable in social settings with "pretty people."  I allowed my view of myself to taint what I thought everyone else thought of me even though their thoughts weren't what I thought they were.  I know what you're thinking...this is all fine, Erin, but how does this apply to me?  After you go through this major life change, you're going to realize how much you've changed not only physically, but also mentally and socially.  You'll become the person who can walk in any room with your head held high ready to conquer whatever the people in that room have to dish out, whether positive or negative.  You carry yourself differently.  You love yourself differently.  When your view of yourself changes, others' views of you change as well because you present yourself as someone who loves herself.  I'm not saying that only small people are cute...that's a bold faced lie.  BUT for me...I wasn't comfortable in my skin when I was big, and therefore, I held myself back from reaching my full potential.  Now that I'm alot more comfortable with myself, I am able to present myself with more confidence in any situation.  Stick with this...become someone you are proud to present in any situation!  You can do this!  Changing your life is about so much more than being "skinny."  It's about learning to love the person you are when you are working to be your best.